Living with Pancreatitis...is never easy

When I first discover that I had to undergo a full blood test; the feeling was miserable...I was having self monologue session "am I that sick?"..."am I going to die?"...I could accept anything else, as I went to SUNMED initially for the purpose to justify my severe headache and body ache...after 3 tubes of blood drained out from my blood vessels I was getting more anxious...after hours of patience and anxiousness I was transferred from the ER to ordinary ward...I was happy at that moment as my mom was there to accompany me and I was given some rooms to relax in other words escapism from a "torture chamber"...mesti people who are reading this will be boggling what I mean by torture chamber; it is actually my workplace...lets continue with what happened after I was transferred to an ordinary ward...at first I was attended by a viral infectious disease expert until the result of the diagnosis was out..all of a sudden I was referred to an endocrinologist; a diabetics expert...Alhamdulillah god has sent someone to help me with the permanent life change... My glucose level at that time was 18, BP 180/101 and cholesterol 10...I was a bit depressed until the hospital had to send me for a counseling session as I was stress over work and now about my health...it took few days for me to accept the fact that I'm no longer free to eat...everything has to be low sodium,low sugar, low carb and high fibre...there goes my favorite nasi lemak and pizza as well as fruit juices...finally I was attended by a dietician an luckily she is pretty that made me to be a little bit attentive listening to her advices and suggestions... From this narration and incident I've learned one most essential thing which is not to be stressful over unnecessary stressors....it's time for me to manage my stress level...regular EXERCISE and healthy diet...LESSON LEARNED!!!time to adapt with my new life...

Student dulu VS. Student sekarang...

Student dulu vs. Student sekarang….

“Adoiii!!!”(said my 15 months nephew)…perhaps it has been ages since I last write something here (it’s always the case). When I rewind to the time I was a student, not just the air was less polluted but how people behave is so different. Tak tahu la kenape tapi memang berbeza sgt (“totally different”; mcm izza sebut…ahakz). Never mind, let’s continue what has been kept in my thoughts for so long. When I was a liitle kid I still remember how we are afraid to even talk to our teachers (respect what I mean). Even sometimes I know that I would have to settle with a decision that I don’t really agree with. Ntahle mase tu things just work that way and almost every students share the same belief when it comes to respecting others. But looking and the younger generations nowadays; sedih and kecewa when as early as in pre-school they could say what they want to say to the teachers and justified further by the parents' visit to the school (sometimes, datang dengan lawyer sekali). What a good example showed by the parents (I know there’s nothing wrong of being protective and defensive but too much isn’t good for anything). Contrary to what happened during my time; I would never have the guts to tell my mom even if I’m caned by my teachers. The reason is simply because, my mom will always be the lawyer for my teachers (teachers are always right-memang mcm orang dulu-dulu). I know some said that old fashioned and lame for now, but for me interms of shaping a child’s behavior the traditional way are always better. There’s no need of clarification as social illnesses are alarming among the young generations; and rectification is urgently needed. So to my two nephews & my students regardless where you are, hopefully you could be someone who respect others and someone who are salute because of your good behavior. AMIN… (I'm sorry if the words are not well said, but it is my concern...yela ape akan terjadi to the younger generations?)

“BIAR MISKIN HARTA, JANGAN MISKIN BUDI BAHASA”

What else after graduating?

Waaahhh!!!…lamenye tak update blog...why??? sebenarnye malas and busy...but that is just a lame excuse....answering to my question...what else???HELL a lot of thing...sometimes just wish that i could GM(genitacally modify) my self so that i could stay at a particular age that i enjoyed most...is that possible??i don't think so...but never mind,lets continue with my story...anyway life after graduating has never been easy as you thought. Too many challenges perhaps…everything is about paying bills and the worse part would be pursuing my masters degree…paying bills is very taxing where in 10minutes time or perhaps in a blink of eye via maybank2u.com it's empty....aaaarrrgggghhhhh...stressful but its my responsibilities as a son and as to Allah S.W.T....regarding the master, i do feel that i better get started before it turns rusty; imean my brains... it will be very challenging due to the fact that working and studying is two tedious things but enjoyable…Mengajar versus Belajar…same verb but different task and responsibilities. For now I’m very happy with what the Almighty has provided for me and home HE would shower me with more blissful events and blessed me with good things…But my mind just can’t stop boggling about what’s next???what’s next???...am I on the right path???....Hopefully things will be fine and I will just follow the flow as I have faith that everything is already written and we plan but Allah determines….The end of my undergraduate life is just the beginning of my life…let’s color this new chapter with colorful things…One more thing I am grateful as I am always bless with good people surrounding and filling in the blanks in my life especially my family….same goes to my colleagues no matter where they are and my beloved students….But I still wonder why, a lot of students nowadays are rude and ungrateful??? I’m sad and curious and pissed off!!!!mixed mode…

Life After finishing school.....

It has been soo3x long after my last entry due to time constrains....After the massive work load finalizing my final year project...I’m now more relax and I finally have my own sweet time....doing whatever I wanted to do before (macam qada’ la) nak tidooooooo, hehehe....now I’m worried with my final results and life as a post graduate students.. I thought life would be easier after graduating but it is surely and certainly a misconception...it is definitely more tiring, challenging, mind boggling and worrying with lots more responsibilities.....I've promised to myself to make my family happy especially my mom...Life is too short and you will never know up till when Allah pinjamkan the life to me and happiness because it is all temporary after all....So I really need to gear up as fast as I could...Insya-Allah I'llbe able to manage with all this...Perhaps I am now more concern about employment issues rather than my studies like before, where will I work?? Which organization? My career path and furthering my education.....last but not least the paycheck (not to be money minded but money is now days a necessity.... Hopefully I will be employed and working with an above average organization so that I can pursue with whatever I’d planned earlier...We plan but Allah determine.....To my students Happy School Holidays and good luck to everyone in life and whatever you are in to......

4 down and 1 to go....

Alhamdulillah....i'm now down with 4 and 1 more left to be finalized...though i'm sure the 4 is not final and i still have lots more to ammend as usual...sometimes i'm just curious whenever i got back the thing(a taboo word for now), it will be full of scribbles and corrections even though it is the 4th time i resubmitted it...There goes the self-talk "aq ni x cerdik sgt ke smpai semua aq buat x pernah betul?!!!" or is it "sape yang problematic ni?" to high expectations perhaps....maybe its better to aim for the sky coz u'll drop on the clouds... sad but i guess i have to swallow it even it is so painful and bitter...sometimes i'm puzzled when it comes to this thing......Hopefully Allah will ease my process of finalizing it and help me to have the perseverence and patience to deal with this kind of situations which i'll be facing it sooner when i start working....Never mind Mohamad Ateff, Allah will never be cruel to his slaves.....God will help those who help themeseleves....Believe it and it will come to you!!!Law of attraction...

Brain damage.....

Towards the end of the semester, everything is starting to get dirty and messy....assignments are swarming over the head and life can be so miserable with the countless da of sleeping on top of the burden of finalizing my A.E....Fiuh!!!!!Penatnye!!!!!!!!Somehow i think the root course is me.....Poor time management and the everlasting procastination thingy....This week is a bonus that i guess should be utilized to get back alligned to the plan i had scheduled and clean the mess and start finalizing my Chapter 4 & 5........God Help me with this semester and give me the strength to face this challenging life.....

2010-hopefully the beginning of the triumph

My New Year Resolution for 2010 (hopefully I could attain all this) : Final edition for this year

• I have to be persistent in every single thing I do especially my studies and graduate with the highest result I could get
• I will always try to be a better person mentally, physically, emotionally and morally
• I will continue the effort to reduce my weight
• I will never make my mom sad and love her always and for eternity
• I will appreciate and cherish my family
• I will always remember and be more devoted to Allah
• I will be grateful with anything
• Have more saving in my account
• Be employed maybe as a contract lecturer at INTEC (this is more to doa i guess amin)
• Apply and continue for M.A program
  
  -AMIN-